Are you harbouring ambitions to become a Dean?

Are you an academic?  Ever secretly longed to become a Dean?  The questionnaire in The Chronicle of Higher Eduction offers you a healthy reality check.

2. As dean, do you plan to maintain an active research agenda?

YES , Incorrect. You know you have to work summers, right? Besides, we need you to keep the trains running, not write about the epistemology of postcolonial fruit flies or whatever.

NO , Incorrect. Have you no intellectual curiosity? How can you possibly oversee research faculty? They’ll never respect you.

3. Do you believe that students are always right?

YES , Incorrect. Really? Grief over the death of a great-aunt’s best friend’s brother’s cat provides sufficient cause to blow off finals week altogether? A bad hangover is a documented disability? Really?

NO , Incorrect. Ah, you’re one of those people who loved John Houseman in The Paper Chase. You prefer a totalitarian regime with just one authority: you. You obviously fail to value diverse perspectives. You view student-centricity as a sign of weakness. Frankly, you make us sick.

Even if you aren’t aspiring to be a Dean, the questionnaire is still worth your time.  Try it. 


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