Are you an academic? Ever secretly longed to become a Dean? The questionnaire in The Chronicle of Higher Eduction offers you a healthy reality check.
2. As dean, do you plan to maintain an active research agenda?
YES , Incorrect. You know you have to work summers, right? Besides, we need you to keep the trains running, not write about the epistemology of postcolonial fruit flies or whatever.
NO , Incorrect. Have you no intellectual curiosity? How can you possibly oversee research faculty? They’ll never respect you.
3. Do you believe that students are always right?
YES , Incorrect. Really? Grief over the death of a great-aunt’s best friend’s brother’s cat provides sufficient cause to blow off finals week altogether? A bad hangover is a documented disability? Really?
NO , Incorrect. Ah, you’re one of those people who loved John Houseman in The Paper Chase. You prefer a totalitarian regime with just one authority: you. You obviously fail to value diverse perspectives. You view student-centricity as a sign of weakness. Frankly, you make us sick.
Even if you aren’t aspiring to be a Dean, the questionnaire is still worth your time. Try it.